Erase Fear

Do you spend time reliving your past challenges?  So many students I work with are caught with fear of past missteps coming back again.  They are in one of two places:

1. Reviewing past challenges over and over looking for ways to make them different.
2. Fearfully looking back at mistakes and letting this affect their decisions going forward. 

While I whole-heartedly agree with doing an after action review after any project, it should be a one-time review and analysis.  Take one opportunity to figure out the challenges and decide what you would do different in the future.  After this has been figured out, leave it in the past since you are unable to make the changes now.

The larger challenge with many is the second place many people end up.  They let the one challenge which happened hold them back from moving forward since they are afraid the same mistake will happen.  

For example, I encounter this frequently with those who have had a negative experience with someone else’s coaching program.  Many times the program was unsuccessful in helping them achieve their goals and they “won’t make that mistake again”.

The challenge with this line of thinking is they figured it was the coaching program which was poor and they never did the first process above to figure out what happened.  Their choice was to never invest that kind of money again until they have recouped their original investment.  This kind of thinking continues to punish you into the future for the past mistakes.

The only truly effective option is to figure out what went wrong. Was it a poor program?  Did you reach out for assistance as often as the program allowed?  Did you ask for another coach if the one you were working was unable to help you?  Were you 100% committed to the program and did everything possible to make it work?  What was missing which is what you really wanted to assist you?

By creating a wall instead of discovering the challenge, you relive the past keeping you stopped and stuck in an area which is impossible to change.  Sounds a bit like insanity, right?  By going through the after action review, you are able to focus on what’s next and affect your future in a positive way.  Sounds like progress, correct?  Which option is most effective for you?